Being History: How to Live and Love in Interesting Times

My personal evolution and learnings of the past 3.5 years

This story is about  my personal evolution over the past three and a half years. This is going to be an outpour. Beware.

If you want the punchline, here it is: the world is f*cked up. Oh, the world is so tragically f*cked up. And the things are almost always not what they seem. And people lie. And go under hypnosis often. And there is love that is not wobbly but it is very rare. So beautiful though.

Background

I lost my innocence about politics as a teen due to being Russian. I lost my innocence about “our democracy” many years ago when my ridiculously abusive ex set me up to be arrested and jailed.  While I was jailed, the feds tried to scare me and break my emotional spine. I was very pure, and they were very mean. They failed to break me but the experience traumatized me for at least a decade, and the healing process was tough.

I don’t remember how old I was but maybe like eleven

All my life, I have been choosing unconventional paths. I wasn’t trying to be original, I just found well-es…