"But They Are So Mean!" On Overcoming Fear

Plus, the link to tomorrow's Philosophy Club call

As I was thinking about yesterday’s post, I asked myself if I could offer personal experience-based tips on overcoming fear. So I thought about the times when I overcame it.

I have to say, each time was dramatic as hell.

One time, I pretended to not be scared when I was attacked by a sex trafficker in Southern China, and I kind of didn’t know what else to do other than pretend that I wasn’t scared. After a few hours of being beaten in front of two separate crowds, I ran away.

I remember the moment when I jumped out of his truck, and it wasn’t me who was jumping. It was the loving spiritual forces who moved me and got me out of there.

Then I remember losing fear again when absurdly, I found myself in jail after being set up by an abusive ex. After days and days in a limbo, treated like an animal, and completely pushed against the wall, I just didn’t care to be scared anymore. I didn’t have any energy left to be scared. I let go. I thought, “whatever happens, happens,” and then shortly after, things started moving in a good direction, and then it all worked out.

I am not sure it’s possible to overcome fear in a lukewarm mode, maybe, maybe not—but it seems like it happens when the pressure is extreme. When we are in a situation where we either act or die, we compose ourselves in ways we hadn’t known we could, and our spirit shoots straight above our fear. We soar over that fear. And if we keep soaring, it runs away.

Finding a reliable source of love

In my personal experience, when under pressure, it is extremely helpful to connect with your entire passionate being to an inspiring source of courage and love, be it an ancestor whom you admire, or your religious faith, or something else that expands your existential perspective and helps you soar.

By the way, that reliable source of love for you can be you. It is actually quite empowering to give yourself that acceptance, that dignity, that love.

Dealing with total injustice

Under the pressure of great injustice—illogical, undeserved, and oh so wrong— it is easy to feel dejected. Grand injustice may feel extremely disorienting, especially if you are a kind, gentle soul.

What I believe to be true is that such circumstance exists not to torture us, and not to punish us for our sins—but to convince us to fall in total love with our soul and help us remember with certainty that we have always been dignified. Now, this realization may take seconds, or days, or months, or years, or sometimes decades. But it is true, we are lovable, valid people. We were born dignified.

It is our job to insist on being with good energy, to get off our knees no matter what, and yes, cry if need be as we are getting off our knees—but still, get off our knees and give ourselves the permission to be loved and dignified. It is our duty to our own soul to walk tall and strong, to be grounded in our worthy and interesting spiritual mystery, and to be loved, accepted in due time, and always dignified.

PS. So this is the topic of tomorrow’s Philosophy Club call for paid subscribers (Friday March 8, 2pm EST). The link to the call is behind the paywall, after the video of this beautiful dancing couple. As usual, if you want to participate and can’t afford a paid subscription or if you have supported me in the past, please send me a note to be comped, etc. Looking forward to seeing you there and hearing your stories of how you lost your fear..